Monday, October 4, 2010

A Fairy Tale

Once upon a time, in a fictional land called “Miami”, there existed a king – a king who loved to cook and had a place where citizens of the land could go and pay very little money for a meal and dine together in luxury as a family.  This king was the Burger King.

The citizens of “Miami” – both the royalty and the townspeople – loved the Burger King so much that soon the citizens of other places were demanding that the Burger King come visit them.  And the Burger King, being an agreeable king, decided to grant all of their wishes.  It wasn’t very long at all before the Burger King traveled across the land, from mythical places like “Pensacola” and “Portland”, to the fabled “Providence” and “Palm Springs”, appeasing and fattening the masses as he went along.

Then one day, the Burger King decided to share his gift of food with a far away kingdom – a kingdom with beautiful beaches and strange animals - where the people had an insatiable appetite for beef and the culture of the Burger King’s native land.  That far away, imaginary kingdom was called “Australia”.  The Burger King first arrived in the majestic and pretend city of “Perth”, but word of this new king traveled fast across the entire kingdom.  Very soon, it came to be known that another Burger King already existed in a make-believe corner of the kingdom – in a place called “Adelaide”.  Now, this other Burger King was very small - cooking only for a few of his townspeople and not even allowing those people to sit down while they enjoyed their feast.  But, though small, he proved to be a very powerful king.  This other king said to the Burger King: “You cannot copy my name for I am the one and only true Burger King of this kingdom!”  And the Burger King, after traveling so far and so long to arrive in the great new kingdom, was just too tired not to oblige the request of the new, strange king.  Indeed, the Burger King was the most agreeable and fattening king there was.

So, the Burger King made a new friend named Jack, and together they were to ponder a new name for the Burger King.  The Burger King summoned members from his Royal Trademark Authority and they bestowed upon him a list of names that the Burger King was already allowed to use in this new kingdom.  One of those - Hungry Jack - was a name that was made by a young man known as the Pillsbury Dough Boy.  Jack liked this name very much since it was very similar to his own name.  The Pillsbury Dough Boy, being a very close relative of the Burger King, gave his permission for the Burger King to use that new name.  So from that day forward, the Burger King was known as Hungry Jack to all of those in the strange, fictitious land of “Australia”.  And everyone in the kingdom lived happily and more plumpily ever after.

The End.


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